Live at the Elk's Lodge

by Useless Pieces of Shit

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This was one of Useless Pieces of Shit’s final live performances in Tucson, AZ. This tape was recorded by a good friend of U.P.S.’s name Gob. (He is no longer with us but, thank you Gob!) The sound quality isn't very good at times but back then we never got to have a sound check before playing a gig. The sound engineers would try to adjust the sound mix while the band played. Sometimes they would get it dialed in after a few songs but most of the time they never got it correctly. Why do you think they call it punk rock? This cassette has been kicking around in a drawer full of other tapes for many years. We are glad we can now share it with the world digitally re-mastered and hopefully sounding a little better.


released December 6, 2012

This lineup included:
‣Slug Useless on guitar
‣Dumpy Pieces on vocals
‣Rat Shit on drums
‣Dr. Blood on bass


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Useless Pieces of Shit Tucson, Arizona

Useless Pieces of Shit is a band name that you may not be familiar with but in the 1980's they were a hardcore punk rock band with a live show second to no other band of its type at the time. They weren't a product of the major scenes in New York, Boston, D.C., San Francisco, or L.A. so there were no record deals or concert promoters. They were a product of the startup remote scene in Tucson, AZ. ... more

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Track Name: Junkie Punks
Think your rad cuz you shoot junk.
You think it’s cool, we think it’s fucked!
I give you my friendship and what do I get,
sold off for another fix.
If you’ve come to score get out here,
find somewhere else to squelch your fears.
We ain’t trying to be your mom,
but you need help before you’re too far gone.
Rip your friends off gotta scam,
chop off any helping hand.
Steal our trust when you’ve got withdrawals,
flush your junk if you’ve got real balls.
You still think Sid Vicious is cool,
can’t you see he’s a dead junkie fool.
Darby, Janus, the list goes on,
you’ve starting your grave
with the hole in your arm.
Hope you die. Hope you die. Hope you die!
Track Name: Peace Through Uselessness
Get up at five o’clock go to work.
Fell like shit, too little sleep.
Gotta get to work on time or I’ll get fired.
Why am I always so fucking tired?
Working life’s going nowhere.
I’m digging a deeper hole!
The further I go the less I get.
The problem is no one ever gains.
Why should I be useful, I don’t need your job.
Why should I be useful, you’ll just use me up.
Why should I be useful, I’m just a useless slob.
Why should I be useful, when I can be your pain!
Got a raise today, I’m moving up.
Landlord raised the rent again, oh fuck!
The bank will loan me lost of money,
but I can’t make the payments on time.
Boss has to lay me off, business’s slow.
30 day eviction notice, not again!
Back to sleeping on my friend’s floor.
I’m better off when I have nothing!
Why should I be useful, your world’s a great be game.
Why should I be useful, I don’t wanna be a puppet.
Why should I be useful, I want a life of my own.
Why should I be useful, then you won’t hat me!
Why should I? Why should I? Why should I!
Track Name: Everyone's Friend
Forget about friendship, be everyone’s friend.
Suffocate your feelings, play games and pretend.
Act out the role you must want to play.
Ignore yourself, you’ll go away.
Friend for life means give me head.
Friend for life means get me blown.
Friend for life means loan me money.
Friend for life don’t mean a thing!
In your new world you’ll be happy and free.
You can be God living out your dream.
Life of the party, envy of the herd.
Be everyone’s friend, they’ll follow your word.
Friend for life means give me head.
Friend for life means get me blown.
Friend for life means loan me money.
Friend for life don’t mean a thing!
Track Name: Puppycore
You ain’t got no leather jacket.
You ain’t got no red mohawk.
You ain’t got no engineer boots.
You ain’t got no crass albums.
Regan sucks, give me a beer!
You’ll never be as punk as me.
Puppycore, woof, woof!
Puppycore, you’ll never be as
punk as me, till you’re just like me!
You ain’t got no Doc Martens.
You ain’t got no red braces.
You ain’t got no skinhead.
You ain’t got no ska albums.
Regan sucks, give me a beer!
You’ll never be as punk as me.
Puppycore, woof, woof!
Puppycore, you’ll never be as
punk as me, till you’re just like me!
Track Name: You're To Blame
Because you came you made me.
You’re to Blame!
Track Name: Under the Gun
Push the ink deep into your skin till
blood drips down and sweat mingles in.
Snakes and dragons wrap around your chest.
Shadows and demons live in your flesh.
Feel the pain sit under the gun
till your sweat and blood starts run.
Push the ink deep into your skin
submit to the needle again & again & again!
Track Name: Imaged Disturbance

My cat’s about to pop
In a few more days I’ll have a...
Bag O’kittens Bag O’kittens
She’s gonna have them in my bed
I wanna shoot them in the head don’t want no..
Bag O’kittens Bag O’kittens
I guess I’ll feed them to my dog
As I should have all along.



There’s plenty of room for 50,000 people.
There’s 50,000 people looking for a home.
Empty buildings all over the city.
Empty buildings for hire and sale.
Empty buildings it’s such a pity.
Empty buildings so don’t sit and wait.
Squat squat squat SQUAT!!!!
Track Name: Unorthodox Disbelief




Track Name: Life As We Know It
Liar, liar pants on fire
hanging from the telephone wire.
Nanny, nanny, nanny!
Made you look you dirty crook
you stole your mother’s pocketbook.
Nanny, nanny, nanny!

Too fast, too slow,
too blown, tweekin’.
Fucked up, losing it.
Too tired, too hyped,
too much, tweekin’.
Fucking up, blowing it!

Shit, piss, and cum is what you’ve done.
Shit, piss, and cum all your life.
Shit, piss, and cum is so much fun.
Shit, piss, and cum in your pants.
Shit, piss, and cum let it run.
Shit, piss, and cum down your leg.
Shit, piss, and cum it’s so much fun.
Shit, piss, and cum is what you’ve done.
Shit, piss, and cum all at once.
You’re DEAD!

I like girls with tree trunk thighs
and little hairy chest.
I like girls three times my size,
that wear thick woolen vest.
Big chested girls just ain’t my kind,
I’ve got a kink for the crippled, dumb, and blind.
Ugly girls are my cup of tea,
but there ain’t no girl as ugly as me!

A buck her, a beer there,
people suck it up.
A ride her, a joint there,
it all adds up ……
A line here, a pill there,
get all fucked up.
A fuck here, some head there,
it all add up ……
A body here, a city there,
People, blowing up.
A missile here, a laser there,
it all adds up ……
A thought here, an idea there,
but never growing up.
A memory here, a dream there,
it all ads up …… to nothing.

Seem like forever I’ve been alive.
I’m sick of being tired.
Don’t wanna have to work
wanna live for free.
Give it to me!
I want life on a silver platter.
I can’t be bothered.
Don’t wanna have to move.
I’ll just eat what you bring to me.
Seems like forever I’ve been dying.
I’m tired of being sick.
I don’t want to live
I wanna be set free.
Take it from me!
I had life on a silver platter.
That didn’t matter.
Don’t wanna have to move.
My shit is all you’ll take from me.

Who needs love to get drunk and fuck?
I’ve had enough.
Who needs love when you’ve got drugs?
You don’t.
Who needs love to get it up?
I’ve had enough.
Who needs love when you can fuck your friends!
Track Name: So Let It Be Written
As a dog returneth to it’s vomit
a fool returneth to his folly!
We will reach our goal when we
have the courage to laugh as we destroy!
If the Chinese march four abreast into the ocean
the line would never end!
More than 70% of all auto owners spend
more than $300 a year on maintenance and repair!

It’s a tool for every need.
It’s nice to have around.
I like to have it near.
It’s always getting lost.
It’s my favorite little thing
but where can I find it.

Wake up, take a piss, drink some coffee,
smoke a cigarette, get blown,
that a shit, drink more coffee,
smoke a cigarette, get blown!
Watch T.V., eat something,
smoke a cigarette, get blown,
get drunk, fuck someone,
smoke a cigarette, get blown!

Some people want more than they’ve got.
They’ll use power to make you follow.
They’ll use money to make us tame.
They’ll use sex to keep our interest.
They’ll use drugs to control our brains.
To make us want what they want to make us want.
Track Name: Three Headed Puppy
My dog’s in heat if it gets fucked
I’ll get it blown, deform its pups.
Give her acid, feed her pot,
put some downers in her slop.
My dog’s knocked up and fucked up too,
instead of water I give her brew.
Her stud was into S&M,
tied her on the clothesline for weeks on end.
A few months later the day had come.
I couldn’t believe it a three headed pup,
ate through her skin and ate the other pups.
The A.L.F.’s gonna hate my guts.
Three headed pup in my backyard,
fights with itself to lick its balls.
Growls at the neighbors, barks at the cops,
breaks into my house and eats my pot!
Three headed pup with three minds of its own,
ate through the fence and stated to roam.
Chased the dog catcher down the street,
tries to kill everything it meets.
My dog was knocked up I fixed her junk,
gave her ludes deformed her pups.
Now I’m gonna make big bucks,
cuz my dog gave birth to a three headed pup.
Track Name: Too Much Caffeine
Bittersweet nightmares stir my gut.
Pour the black magic into my cup.
Slip into the world of adrenalin’s dream.
Worship the alter of the Colombian bean.
Too much caffeine, not enough coffee.
Bleeding stomach proves I’m a Java Junkie.
Too much caffeine, not enough coffee.
heart palpitations and getting dizzy.
Track Name: Get On With It
There will never be a world of peace
until all human life has ceased
It’ll only take a couple of minutes to kill
the world and everything in it
Get on with it end it all
Watch each other die in a fireball
Let it boil curdle and rot
Put an end to our meaningless slop
Everyone’s waiting for the savior to come but
when he comes he’ll be a hydrogen bomb
There will be no angels or trumpets played
we’ll all be in hell on judgement day
Get on with it end the world
Fry it up into human curd
We’re better off dead mindless masses of shit
End it now get on with it
Track Name: Closing Movement

Deep down inside I hate myself,
I don’t love you or anybody else.
Deep down inside it’s hard to face
the fact I can’t even love myself.
Deep down inside I realize
my life has been one big disguise.
To keep on hiding deep inside
the fact I could never love myself.
Deep down inside I start to die,
until I do I’ll live my lie.
It’s hard to face the fact that
deep inside I might never love myself.

Do what you want, who sets the rules?
Who plays god? Who play the fool?
Who’s got you running away from yourself?
Who’ll give you pity? Who’ll give you help?
Who makes the choices that determine your fate?
Who’ll give us love? Who’ll give us hate?
Do what you want it’s O.K. to dream,
O.K. to dream, only a dream…

Why even try, it’s not worth it, I can’t take it!
Maybe I’m weak, the pain’s never ending.
I’m getting numb, I begin not to feel it.
Maybe I’m weak, I’ve started forgetting.
Why even try, there’s no way I can do it.
I’m too empty inside.

I wanna do what I want, Not when I’m told.
I wanna do it now while I’m young,
Before I get to old.
I’m gonna make these decisions for myself,
Not no one else.
But how do I know what’s gonna be best?
Wanna live, wanna die, wanna laugh, wanna cry.
Wanna do what I want so I can be myself.
Don’t wanna follow, wanna lead myself.
So I can see who I am and who will really help me out.
Sick and tired of their shit, being led to believe,
in the end there might be things to benefit our lives.
I guess the best feelings that I’ve had deep inside,
have been the ones that made it clear
I’m not like anybody else.

Screwed up in the head, since the day I was born.
Heads’s on backwards, can’t tell right from wrong.
Every fuckin’ chance I get I keep on blowing it.
FUCK SHIT UP!!! No Escape!!!
Brain just lazy, or was I brought up wrong.
I keep on trying, but I can’t hold on.
You know someday I’ll end up in a ditch.

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